A Survivor’s Voice – Survivors of the Sencholai Aerial Attack Speak Out

Written by: Kala Singam., 19

That day as the Kfirs were scanning through the air above our head, I thought we wouldn’t live. We were all like no, it’s not for us. We didn’t expect it to come and drop on our heads. It was so unexpected, we weren’t prepared for it. We woke up and we were doing our morning chores. Brushing our teeth, washing our face, braiding our hair, and generally we were all really in high spirits, excited for the day’s activities to begin. But what awaited us that day was not what we anticipated.

Even if our wounds heal in the years to come, the mental trauma, and the deeper wounds in our hearts will never heal. We saw people die in front of us; we stood by vulnerably watching them die, unable to do anything. When even our own lives were not in our hands, how are we to save the others’ lives. As I ran, and crawled my way to safety, I saw endless rows of dead bodies.

As a result, we are not the only victims, our parents and friends have also become victims. Now they live in constant fear of what will happen to us, and what will happen to them? And there is absolutely nothing to be done. We’ve become completely dependent on others. For the simplest thing we are dependent on others. I come to school with my parents’ assistance, if not for their vigorous support I would still be at home dreading that day. In spite of everything at the age of 19, I still look to my parents, and family to comb my hair, to take a bath, and ride a bike.

We never thought it would happen, not to us, not now. I was supposed to take my AL (Grade 12) exam in 2007 but now I am in a grade lower. So I will be taking my exam in 2008 because of my treatment, and recovery period, I missed a lot of classes. And even after a year, there are still many who are unable to come to school due to internal and external wounds.

Something has to be done so the next generation doesnt’ end up like us. Please do something, we believe that the world will be kind to us; we believe that they will do something. So please stretch your helping hands out towards us.

Senthamil Things:Life

Written By: Senthamil Stefi

As a child you become acquainted with a routine, a sense of pattern. Things always seem to be in order. Things seem to be very well structured and planned. But as you grow up you begin to realize that the sense of order, that sense of plan increases in entropy and sometimes even causes your mind to spiral down into a very dark place. But you see, this is life. Life is about changes. As humans, we are wired to resist change. Change gives us anxiety, a sense of fear of the unknown. Our minds try to force us into a state of retreat. It is ultimately up to our will power to push through. Change is what allows us to grow as human beings. Life is about adapting to those changes and persevering and becoming the best “you” there can be. In no means am I saying it will be easy because honestly it won’t be. But after the initial steps and several pitfalls into a very dark place, it’ll all be worth it in the long run. That being said, in life never stop setting goals, though they may change progressively with time. Never stop setting them and re-setting them. Don’t let the dark place pull you down. Don’t sell yourself short and live for others and the reputation that comes along with it. Choose a career path that makes you happy. That does not necessarily mean it’ll make others happy in the moment but that doesn’t matter. At the end of the day it’s “your” life and the sky is the limit. I know along the way people will shoot you down, but that doesn’t mean what they say is true. You are your biggest critic…remember that. Believe in yourself because you have the potential for greatness. No child is born innately smart. Expertise in various fields are skill sets that are achieved over time with consistency and determination, whether it be Mozart or Steve Jobs, they weren’t born intelligent. They were born just like you and I. It was their will power to succeed and to persevere that led them to greatness. At the end of the day no matter who you are, no matter what age you may be ….. your destiny lies within your own hands. Don’t sell yourself short because you’re FAR MORE than you think… trust me. So don’t be afraid of change. Take a risk and become the king to your own chessboard.

Digging Deeper: “You are more beautiful…”

Written By: Renuka Thayaparan

Last weekend, I went to the park with a few of my cousins. We were all wearing beautiful summer clothes sitting and just chatting when I saw one of my younger cousins, just 6, smiling and told her that she was beautiful. She replied back saying that I was more beautiful than her and that she was cute. At that time, I didn’t really think of it as anything, maybe thought it was just modesty. (You know how when someone gives you a compliment you sometimes feel like you need to give one back). But later, I thought about why she said that, and why she says I am more beautiful than everyone all the time. And it hit me, she said that because I am considered fair-skinned amongst Tamil families, whereas she and our cousins are more dark- toned.

At even a young age, beauty perceptions are formed based on socialized beliefs and ideals of beauty. In Tamil families, fair skinned it equated to beauty, and sadly becomes engrained in the minds of young girls. Other ideals we hold, of thinness and symmetry also become benchmarks young girls use to measure themselves against – often taking extreme measures to reach certain ideals.

We are very much part of the problem. When we first meet a little girl for the first time, we fill her with praises about how cute she is, or how beautiful she looks in her dress. Its an icebreaker we adults use to make small talk with little girls. But doing this reinforces beauty ideologies and gives way too much importance to physical beauty. Our emphasis on beauty as a society is resulting in the increase of eating disorders and a decrease in self esteem in young girls.

Instead of meeting a little girl for the first time and tell her she’s beautiful, maybe we should ask her something about her inner self, something more stimulating and related to her personality. We can maybe instead say, ‘Hi ______, its nice to meet you. Do you like to read/draw/build lego/play soccer/etc? These questions can draw out other parts of a girl that she may be interested in while also giving you an opportunity to praise other parts of her personality. There is so much more to a little girl than a cute dress and a beautiful hair clip, its our responsibility as society to just dig a little bit deeper. 🙂

Thangachi’s Corner: High Risk, High Reward

CTYA’s Blog has started a new Feature every other Wednesday called “Thangachi’s Corner”. “Thangachi’s Corner” is a comfortable space to discuss relatable topics and issues relevant to the Canadian Tamil youth of today. For more information about this feature or to suggest a topic, feel free to e-mail us at blogs@ctya.org!

Written By: Keerthana Raveendran

I want to be an author.

Yep. It was my childhood crazy dream.

We all have these kinds of dreams about our future when we’re young. Maybe you wanted to be a bird when you grew up. Maybe you wanted to be a part-time firefighter, nurse and rock-climber all at once. Perhaps you wanted to spontaneously win the lottery one day and spend your life travelling the world (this particular idea lingers longer than usual). For me, the crazy dream was to publish a novel.

The difference is, while some people usually grow out of their wild ideas, I held onto mine for as long as I can remember.

The trouble with writing, though, is that it’s unlike any nine to five job. It’s a difficult occupation to pursue. It offers no guarantees, routine, or promise of success. You can’t turn on that inspirational part of your brain whenever you want and produce genius. Most of the writing process is made up of procrastination. You can spend six days trying to write a single sentence, and then spend a single hour, two weeks later, scribing five thousand words as if you’d known exactly what belonged on the page all along. If you’ve ever struggled to write an essay, you’ll be very familiar with the process.

Writing is high risk, high reward. And I in particular, have never been the risky type.

What I’ve learned over the years, though, is that you need to be committed to get what you want, whether it’s a job, a state of mind, or a possession. For some, commitment means setting regular deadlines to meet goals. For others, it’s about constantly being reminded of why that special objective is worth the trouble. It’s one thing to dream about succeeding, but another entirely to go about doing it.

Desire goes a long way – you can either passively wait for all your dreams to come true and risk bearing disappointment in the long run, or you can grasp your challenges by the collar and face them with eyes wide and heart open – who knows, you may even be surprised by what you can accomplish.

So in this hectic world where there is school to attend, work to get through, OSAP to repay, and barely enough time to write essays for school, let alone on an extra-curricular basis, here’s my high risk with this new feature. Maybe you’ll do the same with your own metaphorical uphill battle. Because these days, hard work might not give you what you want. Even sheer luck won’t get the job done. Sometimes, you just have to want it badly enough.

About the Author:

Keerthana Raveendran, known by her flock as Thangachi, is an aspiring author with an eye for the eccentricities of the Tamil Canadian culture. As an unemployed student with a mountain load of student debt, she is currently broke, so you will probably be able to relate to her. As a writer, she has a special kind of wit that is present on the page and absent during the awkward conversations you tend have with her in person. Thangachi is currently a Masters student studying English at York University.