A heartfelt message by Sharmila.
Become a Blood Donor: Canadian Blood Services
“I always dreamt of giving a wedding speech, look what you made me do Mayuran. I know you are here, I can feel your presence. I remember you telling me that I’m in good hands and I don’t need to worry… my hands are right here please come hold me throughout this speech. I’m not here to tell you how much I love you as you already know. I promise I will let you go in peace so stay with me till I’m done.
I first want to thank the almighty god. I’m extremely happy that god has chosen me to be with you, god trusted me, god knew I would give my everything. God doesn’t give us problems that we cannot handle but at this very moment I wish I wasn’t strong as god perceived.
You wanted me to leave you when you first found out that you have Leukemia, you thought I came into your life at the wrong time but baby I was chosen by god to stand by your side and it took you awhile to realize that. Never once I questioned god “why this has to happen to me” instead I accepted his challenge and fought for someone I dearly love. Mayuran, you are worth every struggle we have been through. Don’t be sorry for leaving us, we are not disappointed but proud of you and the brave battle you faced with Leukemia. Thank you for holding all your pain for this long.
Even though we spent most of our days in the hospital, you still managed to make me laugh. You turned the hospital into a paradise. I’m not selfish to keep you in pain just because I can’t live without you. When you love someone you want that person to be happy regardless of the pain and suffering you’d go through. I want each and everyone of you to understand that. It is very selfish for us to want Mayuran back in our life, especially when he was struggling to even breath on his own which we take for granted.
WE weren’t the one in pain
WE weren’t the one who spent a year in hospital
WE weren’t throwing up blood, bleeding from nose
WE weren’t the one who lost their appetite and were unable to walk
Mayuran WAS!
How can I not be happy when I know Mayuran is sleeping peacefully with no pain…
No one seems to understand Mayur, I hope you do when I tell you I’m happy for you and I’m glad you found the peace that you desired and deserved.
No one in this room have experienced what Mayuran & I did. We at such a young age shared a beautiful and powerful relationship.
I was able to feel your pain, Mayur. I was able to read your in mind… our love is so true that when you passed away you came to me and asked if its okay for you to leave me.
Guys, don’t pity us! We had everything. Be grateful and thankful for what you have. Embrace every moment you get to spend with your loved ones so that you won’t regret anything when they leave this world. If you are not happy with the life you are living, from my experience I would suggest you to go spend 5mins in a hospital. I guarantee you when you walk out no matter how hard life may seem, it will become a treasure to you and you will learn to appreciate.
Mayuran would ask if you ate when he didn’t eat anything for 2 months and if anyone walked in his room he would ask how are you doing, when he himself knows that he is in a bad shape unable to move his body. That’s who Myran is.
You didn’t fight Leukemia for yourself, you fought because you didn’t want to put us down but by doing that Mayur all this time you were hurting yourself. You are so precious, that’s why god took you early… god knew you don’t deserve to live in this corrupted world. No matter how amazing of a person you are, people will still find a way to hurt you. That’s the world we are currently living in.
To all his friends,
You guys were very supportive and helpful. Mayur talked about each & everyone of you. Don’t feel bad for not being there. Mayur did not want you guys to see him suffer, thanks for respecting his will.
To honor Mayuran’s battle… Mayuran & I kindly ask you to become a blood donor. Mayuran required at least 2 units of blood per day. If he did not have 1 transfusion he would have not made this far. A lot of people fighting cancer need your help.
We tend to take a lot more than we give but this is in you to give. I know Myran would appreciate if you do so!
If it wasn’t for Kaneshka this awareness would not be as successful as it is, if she didn’t take the initiative. I want you all to know how much hard work she has put towards improving Myran’s health. Mayuran & I appreciate your continuous hard work and dedication for the South Asian Marrow Network. I would love to continue this wonderful work you have created in honor on Mayuran.
Thank you!
I wish I knew someone who had cancer in the past, that way I would have known that chemo does more bad than good to your body. My advice to everyone, if you know someone fighting cancer tell them chemo should be their last option. You can cure cancer by eating healthy, changing your diet, doing yoga, meditation and by taking other natural remedies. By the time I figured this out it was too late for Myran but I’m not stopping here. I’m not a doctor nor god, from what I have experienced I’m willing to help whoever needs my assistance. I want to educate more South Asians about leukemia and how to prevent it.
Before all, one should learn to be pro-active than re-active.
Everyone has a purpose in life. Your purpose was to teach us all about Leukemia. Because of you not only people have a better knowledge of Leukemia but also the process of Bone Marrow Donation and Transplant. Because of you tons of people got registered as potential donors. You sacrificed your life to save many – You are my Superhero!
I also fulfilled my purpose, I fought for you and I know I gave my all, I have no regrets whatsoever, I faced my problems and stood there till your last breath.
YES! Sharmila is in pain
YES! She’s crying
She feels like someone just crashed her heart…
But don’t worry about her. Time will heal her pain…
No she won’t forget you but will learn to live with beautiful memories that you gave her.
As I promised you Mayur, I will keep my head up & stand tall. I’m not afraid to face what tomorrow holds for me, because you showed me the true meaning of life.
I believe in end-of-life as much as I believe in re-incarnation : A lot of people come back to this world in a newborn to complete their desires.
Don’t force yourself, don’t rush into things. Take your time and analyze what you really want. At least for once be selfish – do only and everything that makes you happy. You shall endure the much needed rest after a yearlong battle.
When it’s my time to crossover Mayur… be there to take my hand – Greet me with a smile and welcome me home!
THIS IS NOT MY FINAL GOODBYE AS YOU WILL BE FOREVER BY MY SIDE AS MY GUARDIAN ANGEL!”
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Tags: Speak Out
